I read your blog thingy. I do not understand all the degradation, but we know for sure we don't get to choose what turns us on. I am sorry your marriage(s) didn't work out. Did the failure(s) have anything to do with her having other partners?
I always loved cuckold dirty talk with both my wives. In particular I would ask my first wife questions about her 'other' sex life and she always answered honestly. I have written about it in my true life blog giving lots of horny examples. https://xhamster.com/posts/10542675